Men Vs Boys

I was having a conversation with a good friend yesterday.  I was telling him that I had contemplated on moving to a different city that would offer more as far as things to do, a better career and possibly finding love.  My experience in Orlando has been daunting.  I don't know if its the men I attract, however, I seem to find what he would call "boys".  About a month ago, I met someone who was in their 40s and knew exactly what he wanted.  That day, he wanted me.  It was an eye opening experience.  I met him at a conference where he was well known by other people his age who were established.  I met so many people and it opened my eyes to new opportunities and what I might be capable of.  What impressed me the most is that he was so honest! 

The biggest difference is men know what they want and they are confident enough to tell you that.  Boys still want to play games.  Recently, I have endured my masochist behavior by starting dialogue with someone I used to date.  I had hung out with him a couple of times when he told me I was amazing and that we should get married.  Basically, putting something in my ear so I can think about him.  I gave him the benefit of the doubt because I thought he was sincere.  This morning, I checked my Facebook as I normally do and there he was, In a relationship.  WTFreak!  Man up and tell me you're interested in another girl.  I won't be mad.  I wasn't the girl for you.  I would respect you more for being honest than if you hide and I find out on my own. 

If I have enough confidence to tell someone he's not for me and I'm a woman, then I would expect the same integrity from a man.  I might come off a little harsh or strong but I believe a woman deserves to get treated with respect regardless of the situation.  Yes, I don't put up with a lot of BS and yes, I speak my mind but those are all building blocks to figuring out whether this relationship is not for you.  There is no mystery because I know to have a successful relationship, you have to be honest (unless you're going to surprise me with a piece of jewelry) :-) 

Don't you know the key to a great relationship is communication.

Downtown Duesche

There is a breed of guy I absolutely despise.  Its the guy who lives downtown and is always out and about on the hunt for women.  Last week, out of boredom, I sent a text to someone I had been talking to briefly to grab a quick drink.  I kept putting off the meeting because something I just sensed something cocky about him.  Anyhow, he invited me down to a familiar bar where I know the manager so I felt comfortable enough to go. 

When I go there, I didn't see him right off the bat.  I sat at the bar for about 10 minutes waiting for him to reply to my text to tell me where he was.  Finally, I turned around and realized he was right behind me.  I met him at the table he was sitting and as soon as I got there, he asked me if I wanted a drink.  At the bar, we grabbed my signature vodka tonic and a shot.  When we got back to the table, he started his spiel about how hot I was.  He mentioned, he lived downtown and I joked, well, at least you don't have to drive.  His hands were all over me.  I knew something was wrong.  He then said that since I was drinking, I should just go home with him.  If there's anything I know about dating, do not go home with a guy on the first night?!!?  You will have a one night stand and there is a very high probability, he will not call you again. 

As he went on and on about his downtown apartment, I got bored.  I honestly don't care about what you have or where you live.  Make me laugh, intrigue me, say something interesting.  I have the tendency to want to wander or people watch when I'm bored.  You can ask my closest friends.  My ADD was definitely kicking in.  If a bunny rabbit ran in front of me, I probably would had chased it. 

In the midst of talking, he asked me what I perceived of him.  I told him the truth, that he came off like an a$$hole.  I knew this would offend him but at this point, I started not to care.  He kind of laughed it off then told me he knew why I was on an online dating site.  Referring to the fact that I might be insecure because according to him, only insecure people people-watch.  After I was offended, he told me he had to go to the bathroom.  I waited for him on watch because his friend conveniently started a conversation with me.  I think he knew there was no way I was sleeping with him because when he came back he started talking to another girl at the bar.  I was already annoyed, so I told his friend I needed to go to the bathroom, which was a lie.  I walked right out the door and back to my car.

This kind of guy is only concerned about getting laid and finding a girl stupid enough to fall for his antics.  His nice car, his downtown condo, the fact he's getting the girl drunk.  Be wary, this guy is not interested in you.  He won't ask you questions about your life or how you feel or he's not interested in talking at all.  I knew my instincts were right on point when I sent him a text (because I'm way too nice) saying I left because you just wanted to get laid.  He replied, "Yes".

The Younger Man

When I meet someone, I attempt to give them the benefit of the doubt because I don't know their habits or their history. I do keep my guard up and only allow enough of myself to be seen by the other person. When it comes to younger men, we meet, and they tell me, I'm different. Again, I give them the benefit of the doubt and an opportunity to pursue me. I have never been proven wrong from my original theory. Not to sound like I am on a pedestal, but I have experienced several trials in my life which have left me to be more mature than the average 24-year-old. I take into consideration my surroundings, and I am extremely patient. I despise when a person denies something I can see. Younger men feel if they admit it then they are letting something go. What they do not realize that knowing the truth now will eliminate problems in the future.

A younger man will always be a younger man. And until I am proven differently, I will continue to live on that theory.