Ryan Reynolds

Last night, I went on a date with someone I met off of Match.com.  Initially, I didn't have high expectations because he didn't really seem to be my type physically on his profile and after talking to him on the phone, it was hard to get a story from him.  Anyhow, I was being overly critical just to protect my possibly high hopes of finally finding someone. He convinced me to reschedule a date with an older man which I was having second thoughts about.  So I met him at a pool hall and as I approached the door, I was in shock.  This guy looked like Ryan Reynolds.  He didn't look like his profile pictures as at all, in a good way.  In my honest nature, as we sat at the bar, he asked why I was being so shy and I responded that he didn't look like his pictures and I was kind of in awe and a little nervous.  He then asked what I thought about his profile.  I told him my opinion considering I had been honest with him and told him of my experiences in dating and what women are looking for.

The date went on kind of awkwardly as we competed with each others sarcasm.  I felt a weird tension and lack of connectivity, I think it was because we were competing instead of getting to know each other.

During out date, I did tell him not to change his profile unless things didn't go well.  So because I'm so nosey, I did check him out since he hadn't attempted to contact me the following day.  He changed it.

I think the point is, I didn't realize I was an online dating profile consultant.  I was asked whether I've been on a blind date before and I laughed only because I've had so many dating experiences including Bad Date 4 - The Really Blind Date.  I was really thrown by him really updating his profile per our conversations.  Wow.  That teaches me to give dating advice to potential suitors.

I'm a Strong Woman

Thankfully, I have the spirit of my grandmother on my dad's side.  The strongest woman I know.  Recently, I went to my uncle's funeral in Puerto Rico.  Granted, I never knew him that well but his sons (my cousins) are close to me and I wanted to be there for the family.  I recognized that it was the hardest thing to see the my grandmother cry as I could had never imagined her doing so.

I had to become very independent when I was pretty young, around 14.  There were somethings going on with my life, including my parent's divorce, which lead me to just do everything on my own so I didn't have to burden my family.  Over time, I have just become so accustomed to taking care of myself.  I realize it can be a blessing and a curse.  A blessing because I rarely worry knowing that all my ducks are in a row and a curse because it is hard to let of responsibilities when you might need to sometimes. 

Recently, I read an article Ask a Guy: Are Men Intimidated by Strong Women.  Here are some points which I would like to share:

When someone is secure and self-sufficient:

• They don’t need to control other people.  They are relaxed and guide without
• They have tact and compassion – they can say what they mean clearly without being offensive or arguing.
• They have nothing to prove - they do as they do for their own reasons and desires.
• They are whole and fulfilled because they live their life by their own standards and don’t seek fulfillment through others.
• They are emotionally open and unguarded.  They are secure enough to know that they can defend themselves if necessary, so they don’t need to keep a constant guard up to drive people away.  Insecure people guard their emotions highly, since they fear that if they let their guard down they’ll lose themselves in another person or get hurt."

  My point is a strong woman should be appreciated and cherished.  We aren't naggy and helpless.  We have a voice and like to hold conversations, laugh and have a good time because we know everything else is taken care of.  If you have a strong woman in your life, don't let her go.  She will be an inspiration.

Finding Myself

The last couple of weeks, I have been going through a sort of soul search or rather trying to balance myself emotionally.  I still haven't figured much out yet, however, there has been a little bit of clarity.  I remember, when I was in High School, I was so sure of what I was supposed to become and where I was going.  However, there were some significant events in my life which made me lose my path.  I haven't really found my path since then.  I've been kind of coasting. 

Now that I've been single for a year and a half, it has been more clear that I've allowed things to cloud where I was supposed to be headed.  I used have so much drive and ideas, now I'm struggling to figure out where it all went.  All I know, I am working towards a goal and I'm almost halfway there.

What I need to do is find a balance between who I used to be and who I am now.  Also, what I need to do to be truly happy.  That is my ultimate goal.  I know the things I want.  I just need to get out of this rut. 

My Worth

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to expound... As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more." I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man." I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don't need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone who I can respect.In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy.God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself. When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, "You're asking a lot." She replied,"I'm worth a lot."..> Thank you Helena!

Love in Fairytale Land

I believe I am a product of my generation.  Currently, I am 27 years old and single.  I was engaged once because my biological clock got the best of me.  I wanted to settle down, but I was settling. I have literally been in almost every dating situation one can think of.  I want to share my story with those who might need a pick me up or one who wants to know they are not alone in the world of dating.  It is definitely very intimidating out there.