Ryan Reynolds (But Not Really)

Last night, I went on a date with someone I met on Match.com. Honestly, I didn’t have high expectations. He didn’t really seem like my type physically from his photos, and on the phone, it was hard to get a full story out of him. Still, I was trying not to get my hopes up—call it a defense mechanism. He did, however, manage to convince me to cancel a date with an older guy I was second-guessing. So I gave it a shot.

We met at a pool hall and as I approached the door, I stopped in my tracks. This man looked like Ryan Reynolds. No exaggeration—he did not look like his profile pics… but in the best way possible.

Once we sat at the bar, he noticed I was acting a little shy. When he asked why, I admitted that I was honestly kind of thrown off by how attractive he was in person. He asked what I thought of his profile, and because I’m me, I told him the truth. I gave him my honest feedback, just like I had shared my dating experiences and thoughts on what women are really looking for.

The rest of the date felt… awkward. We were locked in this back-and-forth sarcasm battle, almost like we were competing instead of connecting. There was tension, but not in a sexy way—more like two people trying to one-up each other.

I told him during the date not to change his profile unless things didn’t go well. And because I’m nosy (let’s be real), I checked it the next day. He changed it.

Here’s the kicker—I didn’t realize I had moonlighted as an online dating profile consultant. At one point, he even asked if I’d ever been on a blind date before, and I couldn’t help but laugh. If only he knew about Bad Date 4 – The Really Blind Date. 😬

I guess the lesson here is: maybe don’t give dating advice to someone while you’re dating them. Or maybe... do. Just don’t be surprised when they take it and run—with their profile.

I'm a Strong Woman

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Thankfully, I carry the spirit of my grandmother on my dad’s side — the strongest woman I know. Recently, I traveled to Puerto Rico for my uncle’s funeral. I didn’t know him well, but I went to support my cousins, who mean a lot to me. The hardest part wasn’t the service itself… it was seeing my grandmother cry — something I never imagined I’d witness. That moment reminded me just how deep strength runs in our family, even when it shows up with tears.

I had to become independent pretty early in life — around 14. My parents were going through a divorce, and a lot was shifting in my world. I learned quickly that if I took care of myself, I wouldn't be a burden to anyone. That mindset stuck. Over time, I became the kind of woman who handles business, holds it together, and rarely falls apart. It’s a blessing… but sometimes, also a curse. I know how to keep my ducks in a row — but letting go, asking for help, or sharing the load? That doesn’t come easily.

Not too long ago, I read an article titled Ask a Guy: Are Men Intimidated by Strong Women? A few points stuck with me:

When someone is secure and self-sufficient:

– They don’t need to control others. They lead with calm, not force.
– They speak clearly and compassionately, without arguing or offending.
– They have nothing to prove. Their actions are rooted in their own desires, not external validation.
– They’re emotionally open — not because they’re naïve, but because they know they can protect themselves if needed.
– They’re whole, living by their own standards — not seeking completion in someone else.

A strong woman isn’t cold. She isn’t unfeeling. She’s just built differently. We’ve learned to manage ourselves — our emotions, our needs, our lives — so we can show up for others with joy, with love, and with a clear mind.

So if you’ve got a strong woman in your life? Don’t let her go. She won’t ask for much. But she’ll give you everything — and she’ll inspire you to be better, too.

Finding Myself: Learning to Reclaim My Path

The last few weeks, I’ve been doing a kind of soul search—trying to find emotional balance and reconnect with who I am.

I haven’t figured it all out yet.
But there’s been a little clarity.

Back in high school, I remember being so sure of myself. I had dreams, goals, direction. I knew who I was and where I was going.

But life happened.

Some big, unexpected things threw me off course—and since then, I’ve kind of just been coasting. Not falling apart… just floating.

Realizations in Singleness

Now that I’ve been single for over a year and a half, it’s becoming clearer:

I allowed people and situations to cloud my purpose.

I used to have so much drive. So many ideas.
Now, I find myself wondering where all that energy went.

Still—somehow—I know I’m working toward something.
And even though I’m not fully there yet, I’m halfway to the goal.

Where I Go From Here

What I need now is to find the balance between:

• Who I used to be

• Who I am now

• And who I’m meant to become

Most importantly, I need to figure out what it means to be truly happy.
That’s the goal. Not just accomplishments, not just checkboxes.

Genuine joy.

I know what I want.
I just have to pull myself out of this rut—and keep moving toward it.

My Worth

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to expound... As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more." I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man." I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don't need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone who I can respect.In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy. God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself. When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, "You're asking a lot." She replied,"I'm worth a lot."..> Thank you Helena!

Love in Fairytale Land

I believe I am a product of my generation.  Currently, I am 27 years old and single.  I was engaged once because my biological clock got the best of me.  I wanted to settle down, but I was settling. I have literally been in almost every dating situation one can think of.  I want to share my story with those who might need a pick me up or one who wants to know they are not alone in the world of dating.  It is definitely very intimidating out there.